“Nothing is perfect. Life is messy. Relationships are complex. Outcomes are uncertain. People are irrational.” – Hugh Mackay
You see a pretty face, carry a candid conversation, you like each other, go out on few dates, and decide to enter a relationship. In the beginning, everything is rosy and beautiful, but slowly things start getting monotonous, and the initial spark may begin to fade off. You do not know what happened, but you start feeling the distance from the person with whom you thought you could spend your life.
Related: How To Be The Best Boyfriend?
Are you also feeling the same about your relationship? Do you ever get the ominous feeling that your relationship may fail soon? Probably you are right, and here you will find the reasons why your relationship will fail and what can you do about it:
1. You Hardly Communicate Openly
The success of any relationship is hugely dependent on honest and open communication. If you and your partner have never had an honest one to one conversation in a long time, chances are you are already feeling the distance.
At times, once the thrill of a new relationship is over, you no longer have those sweet talks at night talking about your feelings for one another. An extended period without any open communication may lead to unsaid things and unspoken resentments, is one of the surest signs that your relationship may be ending.
What to do: You might be busy in your jobs and respective careers. However, take time to sit with each other and really talk to them which is more than boring talks of, “How was your day.” More importantly, listen more than you speak and make your partner feel that you are an integral part of his/her life.
2. You have Vastly Different Goals
When you fall head over heels with anybody, you may not even think about getting to know about them in detail. It is one thing to be totally opposite of one another in personality and celebrate your compatibility on the lines of ‘opposites attract.’ It is a whole other thing to have different priorities and goals in life.
Once you get into a relationship without considering this, there may be a chance of future arguments and differences as you are on different roads.
What to do: Before getting into a serious relationship, discuss about each other goals and priorities in life. Have an honest conversation about what you want from life and see if they share your aspirations or understand your dreams. If you discover it later into your relationship, it may be better to move on rather than making a compromise on your dreams and goals which may lead to future fights.
3. It Is Only About Sex
If your relationship revolves only around sex and you are just together because of your mutual fun in bed, then it is a thing to worry. A relationship is much more than just physical proximity and involves living and sharing each and every part of your life. If you just use sex to get away from more important questions, it is a telltale sign that your relationship may end even if you do not realize it at present.
What to Do: Do other activities together which you or your partner like in addition to sex. Go on adventure trips and engage in fun activities on the weekend together. Spend your nights under the open sky talking about each other lives, dreams, and ambitions. Make sure that you connect with your partner on a much deeper level than purely physical.
4. It is Never About Sex
Sex is a crucial component of any healthy relationship. As much as it is exciting, a healthy sex life with your partner ensures a deeper bond and connection. After the initial euphoria of a relationship has passed, if you rarely find yourself getting physically intimate with your significant other, it might not be a good sign for your relationship.
What to Do: Talk to your partner openly about it and find out what is wrong. It may be due to many reasons, and it is better to have an honest conversation about it. Let’s admit it that sex spice up your relationship like any other thing and it is human nature to desire it.
5. You Fight On Same Old Petite Things
Are you and your partner always fighting same fights and arguing over same old things over and over again? Do you regularly find yourself engaged in complaints and verbal arguments every time you are together? A few arguments and fights are natural, even necessary for a healthy relationship.
However, if that is what you always do and unable to let go and forgive each other for mistakes, it does not take a genius to tell you that your relationship is going to fail some day or the other.
What to do: Take a deep breath and really give it a thought in alone about the real reason you always seem to be fighting. As it turns out, most of the time it is due to some old, unexpressed feeling of anger or resentment which triggers your emotions in even other small arguments.
Express them honestly to your partner with a cool head without pointing blame to one another and ask him/her to do that as well. You will soon see your relationship blossoming once again.
6. You Are Worst Critics of Each Other
Do you always find yourself criticizing your partner at even the smallest things? Or vice versa, do you always find your partner criticizing you for everything? When two different personalities enter a relationship, it is not necessary that they like everything about each other.
However, it is one thing to tenderly express your feeling that you do not like something and expect him/her to take care of it. It is whole other story to criticize and blame one another without offering any solution brutally.
What to do: Understand that everyone is not perfect. Let your partner know casually about the things you do not like and ask him/her the same if they have something similar to tell you. A good relationship helps you grow into a better person instead of always making you feel enraged and guilty. Use your relationship to help each other growing into a better version and see the magic return to your relationship.
7. You Frequently Give Silent Treatment
“What’s wrong?”. You say, “Nothing,” or worse, just give a blank stare with no response at all. If your relationship has reached a stage where you often find you and your partner saying nothing to each other, be assured that it is the silence before a storm- the storm which will blow away your relationship if you do not take immediate steps.
What to Do: You will find it better to express your feelings and emotions rather than suppressing them only to explode later and end your relationship. Small, unsaid things over a period lead to far greater damage in long term as the cumulative effect is quite intense. The key to a successful relationship is honest and open communication instead of expecting silent treatment to cure your problems.
Do not ignore the above dangerous signs which indicate an impending doom of your relationship. Yes, they may look scary at first, but it is important to do something about them to save your relationship.
After all, if you want to spend your life with a person who is worthy of your love and attention, it pays to do the necessary hard work and revitalize your relationship from time to time. Don’t you think?